March 31, 2026
King Donny can't figure out how to get out of his war. The Iranians can't and won't surrender. The Iranians won't leave the Straits of Hormuz alone. The NATO countries, several of which have been threatened by King Donny with the use of military force, have replied to his request for naval assistance with variants of "fuck you and the horse you rode in on" and are perfectly happy to watch the US, which they don't like under Trump, and Israel, which they generally don't like, stew in the fat of Donald's juices.
Faced with this, the more rah rah, let's engage in a Protestant Crusade against Islam crowed, and the more sober military minds who have read history, are causing Marines to be deployed. Chances are, they aren't equally enthusiastic about deploying them, as the results of that will be a full scale and even more illegal war than the one we're currently in.
The economy, meanwhile, is turning to a steaming pile of shit, like everything else Donald touches. The stock market is supposedly the only thing the legacy seeking King Donny pays attention to, which probably means that his oligarchic connections are being hurt and calling him up on his cell phone telling him to get out before the wreckage matches that of the East Wing. King Donny, meanwhile, probably doesn't want to be remembered as the idiot who got 20,000 ground troops or more killed. So, as of yesterday, he's thinking of surrendering by simply pulling out.
Overnight, the Iranians targeted Diego Garcia with missiles but not reached their targets for one reason or another, including their being intercepted. Diego Garcia was not previously thought to be within range of Iranian missiles, and it still might not be, given that they didn't hit. Or it may be, or it may be that Iran has improved the capabilities of their missiles over the last couple of weeks.
Iran is busy destroying Middle Eastern oil infrastructure. The economic impacts will last for years.
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