Thanksgiving 2021. Advocating for peace, or Don't Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood*

Linked to Sid Richardson Museum, as this is a 1916 dated painting, it should be public domain.  Russell:  "Man's Weapons Are Useless When Nature Goes Armed".

Tomorrow is what some people call "Thanksgiving Eve".

Not most people, but some people, and today and tomorrow are days in which a large number of Americans are on the road, going home to be with family and friends.

So, some reasonable requests, in anticipation of those gatherings.

From now, through next Monday, please:

If you are a candidate for major office, don't say anything. .  And I mean anything.  Don't voice your opinion on anything for the next few days. The nation deserves it.

This is particularly the case if you have some snotty opinion you wish to voice about something, or somebody, which only panders to your base.

If you aren't a politician. but are one of those folks who insist on voicing your political opinions in a large group, as if everyone else, or at least everyone else in your family, holds the same opinion, just keep it to yourself.

After all, if  you are really convinced that everyone believes the same thing as you do about Trump, January 6, infrastructure bills, and the like, you really don't need to say anything at all, now, do you?   At best, you're only going to learn that somebody has an equally strong, opposite, opinion, and you're off and running on an argument.

Okay, I feel differently about non-political issues, just don't mix them with politics.  I'm fine with people expressing their opinions on why people should get vaccinated, which means that you have to put up with people who are going to hold the opposite opinion.  And other health and scientific opinions as well, as long as they don't get political or wacky conspiratorial.  I.e, if you are tempted to say, "you know, influenza is simply a Portuguese plot introduce by Vasco Da Gama. . ." have a glass of port, or coffee, or something else instead.

If you live in Wyoming, or know a Wyomingite, please don't bring up the series Yellowstone.  M'eh.  It's really about the same as asking people in the physics department about The Big Bang Theory or people from New York if The French Connection depicts their daily lives.

Don't be a rube.

Also, don't drop in some surprising personal belief that is in tune with the times, to show everyone how in tune with the times you are.  As in, "you know, new evidence suggest that Christopher Columbus was a shipjacking dog kicker fleeing for his life. . . "

If you have some objection to Thanksgiving in general, and I know some of  you do, just keep it to yourself.

If there are of college age or just out of college people are there, don't ask. . . "so, when are  you two going to tie the knot?" or "how's school/job/the Navy?".

For that matter, if there are the older beleaguered there, on their one-day off from work, don't ask "so, how's work?", or "I don't mean to bother you, but you're a bicameral legislative mechanic and I am working on a bicameral legislative operative device and I was wondering. . ."

Regarding the Navy, and every military service, if you are one of the people who do it, resist posting on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/TikTok some item of veteran hagiography.  Not every holiday needs to be Veterans Day.  You know what I mean, skip the "While you are safe and warm enjoying your @ER$@# turkey, I hope  you remember that somewhere some kid is behind a M4 carbine eating MRE's keeping your lazy civilian butt safe" or "Only the few will remember what it was like to be stationed at the ammo dump in Guam for Thanksgiving in 1967 worrying that the Red Chinese were going to swim the Pacific Ocean and. . . "

If people drove out to visit you in some distant location, and that location is cool, has neat things to do, or is just scenic, don't insist people stay in and eschew it, as in "oh, thanks for coming to our private chalet in the Swiss Alps, and yes that's our private ski run. . . now, let's pull the blinds down and talk about Donald Trump/football/gall bladders".

And by the way, if you are an employer, don't dump on the employees as they leave the door, as in "have a good @#$@#$ holiday. . . I'll be here working to feed your lazy butts. . .and by the way, whatever you are doing, you are doing it wrong, you lazy @#$@#$".

Finally, if you are one of those people with dietary concerns, self-imposed or otherwise, just spare the rest of us.

I.e, don't go to a Thanksgiving dinner and ask if the turkey is a free-range, free trade, free Tibet turkey.  Just save it.  And nobody wants to hear about your vegan/Keto/Waffle House/ or whatever diet.

Let's have a Happy Thanksgiving long weekend.

Footnotes:

*From:

A 2020 Holiday Reflection. Part 3 of 3. The Resolute Edition

Steve Bannon arrested for contempt . . .

 of personal appearance.

Congress, finally having had enough of some taking Steve Bannon seriously while, at the same time, he looks like a guy who spends his time on a park bench drinking out of brown paper bag, had him arrested for contempt of personal appearance.

"He looks like a bum" said a Congressional spokesman, "and we just couldn't take it anymore.

Bannon checked himself in, appearing with his usual stubble, and was defiant as ever.  "I don't know what they're talking about" said Bannon, "I look like Adonis."  

Bannon was released on personal recognizance but provided with a list of barbers near the courthouse.  

Blog Mirror: 680: A Brief Explanation of Modern Monetary Theory

 

680: A Brief Explanation of Modern Monetary Theory

Oh, and one more thing Governor Gordon. . .

On this topic:  

Lex Anteinternet: Weld County, Wyoming? No thanks.: 

The degree to which boosters completely fail to think out the things that they boost is one of the stories that repeats itself continually t...

Weld County, Wyoming? No thanks.

The degree to which boosters completely fail to think out the things that they boost is one of the stories that repeats itself continually throughout history.

The law of unintended consequences.

I really want an additional 320,000 people eligible for instate hunting licenses.

I haven't been able to draw an antelope license two years running.  I really, really want to add 320,000 people from Weld County to the rolls.  After all, down there, there aren't any antelope to hunt and then they could travel up to my county and make sure that I never drew a tag as they drew them.

Yeah. . . that's something we want alright.

Friday Farming: Carbon Capture.

You have to admit it is funny.

Great Alone Cattle and 12 others follow

Jacob Reinecker

@jsreinecker

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12h

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Elon Musk

@elonmusk

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Am donating $100M towards a prize for best carbon capture technology

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The Missile Knows Where It Is...

This is exactly what trying to get information about gmrs radios is like.

Blog Mirror: The Shopping Trip

 295: The Shopping Trip

Blog Mirror: Dumbest Blog Ever: Advertising Space

Advertising Space

Headlines We Wish We'd See: In Studying Low Gun Violence In Japan Researchers Discover There's Almost Nothing About Japanese Society We'd Care To Emulate.

"Eee gads, researchers declare, Japanese society is closed, xenophobic and in a demographic crash.  Nothing to copy here."

Headlines I wish we'd see: Queen lets Harry Drop Royal Duties and Move To Canada. Former Prince To Take Job As Fry Cook At Tim Hortons

"Their offer of free coffee for life was just too good to pass up, disaffected duke stated".

Headlines I wish we'd see: Commissioner of Baseball Annuls Justin Verlander's Marriage to Kate Upton As Sanction for Astro's Sign Stealing Scandal.

"Pitching for the cheaters is naughty so the pitchers must forfeit the hotty, Roy Manfred proclaims."

The Telephonic Fifth Degree

Y:  This is Mr. Yeoman, is Mr. Vasilyevich in?

Receptionist:  Just a moment, I'll check.

Y:  Thank you.

Receptionist:  Can I tell him your name?

Y:  Um, Mr. Yeoman.

Receptionist:  And will he know the nature of the call?

Y:  Yes, I'm returning his call.

Receptionist:  Are you a client of his?

Y:  No, I'm the lawyer representing the guy his client is suing.

Receptionist:  And to what may I tell him this refers?

Y: (now agitated):  I think if he called me about it, he'll probably know.

Receptionist:  And how do you spell your name?

Y:  Y-e-o-m-a-n.

Receptionist:  Just a moment . . .

(Hold Music)



Receptionist:  I'm sorry, he just left for lunch.

Y:  At 10:30?

Receptionist:  Yes, he's hungry.

Y:  No wonder, every time I see him at a deposition he's on the no food diet.

Receptionist:  Can I leave him a message?

Y:  Well, he was calling me, tell him I called back.

Receptionist:  And can I tell him what the nature of the call was?

It's broken.

A few weeks ago, as I've noted here, my dog was bitten by a rattlesnake.

He's better now, except he lost a bunch of fur on one cheek which has expanded into a streak down his left side.  We now know that sometimes rattlesnake bits result in skin necrosis. That didn't happen, but his hair follicles were damages in the path that runs down his lymph system on that side.

The fur is now growing back.

Our dog, fwiw, is a "double doodle". That means he's 75% poodle, and in the remaining portion of his blood line he's mostly golden retriever and and a little lab.

Effectively, he's a standard poodle, and he thinks and behaves like one. Which makes him, I'll note, a really good hunting dog.

None of which keeps people from repeatedly pointing out to me the recent news story in which the guy who came up with "doodles" is quoted as hating the breed. The best comment about that is that he sounds like a "wackadoodle".

I don't know exactly what his problem is, and I don't care, but I will note that the creators of things who rapidly lose control of what they created often go on to be bitter about it and even hate the thing they created.  I think what they hate is the loss of control, quite frankly.  Anyhow, yes I've heard the comments about "did you hear that the guy who came up with. . . "

By the way, did you hear that the guy who came up with the telephone wouldn't have one in his house?

Yep.

The dog and I went out to jump ducks from prairie ponds in the late morning.  When I got to the first pond I went to load the pump shotgun with 3" shells and accidentally put a 3.5" shell in the chamber and one in the magazine.  It's not chambered for that.

Somehow that error, which could have been pretty bad, occurred to me before I shot at anything, but it necessitated a fifteen minute exercise in completely dismantling the shotgun there in the field.

None of which prevented me from repeated the chambering error, which I caught immediately, again a little later.  I know better than this, but I was really, really tired.  And for no good reason.

A little later, on the same trip, the dog barfed up yellow barf.  It turns out that he'd only eaten yellow leaves from the backyard for some weird reason that morning and refused to eat his dog food.

Anyhow, my Dodge D3500 has a rusting body above the wheel well and that needs to be fixed.  It also needs four new tires really badly.

I haven't fixed either of those but I need to.  I was pondering going to 35" wheels (comments please if you have done that) which would mean that I'd have to put a leveling kit on (comments please if you have done that), and I just haven't gotten around to it.

Part of the reason I haven't gotten around to is is that the D3500 went to Laramie with one of my students and has not returned.  It went to Laramie as the 97 Dodge 1500 broke down on the way to Laramie and I had to have it fixed, which took about a month given everything that was wrong with it.  I'd have swapped it out last weekend, and needed to do so as I had plans that fell through and I didn't want to drive the D3500.

I didn't make the swap, however, as my long suffering spouse didn't want me to make a day trip to Laramie she couldn't go on, and since the kids have left, I've noticed that she's oddly switched her parenting instincts on me.  I'm getting a lot of additional instructions on how to do things. . . as in everything, and back seat driving has increased exponentially.  I'm hoping this phase passes quickly.

Anyhow, the unsuitability of the 1500 for a long trip was pointed out to me when I hit black ice on the highway at 80 mph.  I was lucky to come out of that alive.

Meanwhile, my Jeep, which is my daily driver, has the heat stuck on, needs an oil change, and there's a short in the light system.  I might be able to take are of all of that stuff myself, if I had time, but I don't.  I noted these problems to long suffering spouse recently who blandly noted I should take it in to be fixed, so I scheduled an appointment to do that, for which I was rebuked last evening for failure to take into account expenses in light of the 1500, which actually had come in considerably under budget.

That was also accompanied by the comment that "my car needs an oil change".  It might, I have no idea, but it seems to be perpetually in need of an oil change.  While I normally suggest that this gets scheduled in a mild way, having a frustrating evening I simply replied "well call and schedule one then".  My wife drives the newest car in the house and she doesn't really want me to do it.

The problem here is that for some reason I'm supposed to schedule the oil change.  I don't drive the car, so I don't know when the oil needs changed.  The shop is right near work, so just schedule it and I'll drive it down.

Not the right thing to say.

The reason I was frustrated is that I got tired of the old radio in the 1500 and swapped it out for a new blue tooth one.  I'm driving it, I figured, and I'd like a better radio.  That went fine, except in the process I discovered that the prior radio, which was in it when we bought it  half a decade ago, but which was an aftermarket radio, was amazingly poorly installed.  The frame for it is no better now as that's the way they did it, which bothers me.  Anyhow, after getting it in, I went to test it and found that now that my Iphone has updated to IoS 13.1.2, the setting menu will not stay up and I can't use it.

I need to use it.  I get into my settings quite a bit.

So I asked long suffering spouse about where I should go to get it looked at (I had in mind that this was Best Buy, but wasn't sure). Long suffering spouse, however, gave me a long lecture on the advantages of Samsung phones over Apples.

I don't dispute that, I just don't care.  I need an Iphone as it syncs with work, and that's the lawyers oppressive phone of choice.  Truth be known, I'd treat Steve Jobs the way that following generations of Englishmen and Irishmen have treated Oliver Cromwell, if I had my choice, which I'll leave you, the reader, to look up, but its evidence of my disdain of Iphones and cell phones of all types.

After the Glory of Samsung oratory was over I tried again and eventually got the information that it was Best Buy where I needed to go.

That was cheery news as I had been at Best Buy just the day prior to look for the radio.  There, I experienced the opposite of what I recently did in my search for a wrench, the big national chain only had display models but "could order that for you" whereas the local store I went to the next day had one right in stock, complete with advice from the youthful clerk/installer.

So I went back to Best Buy and was referred to the guy manning the "Geek Squad" desk.  I ran through the problem with him and he recommended trying the hard shut off that I had already tried several times, after having looked it up on the net.  It didn't work for him either.

He then gave me an explanation of the problem in Reformed Hittite, that language spoken by all members of Generation Z.  I had to have him slow down and do it again in English, slowly.  Basically it needs to be reset, which may not work.

Great.

If it doesn't work he informed me that it could go back to Apple, but he didn't know the cost. To which I stated "I'm sure it's high enough that it'd be cheaper to replace this Iphone 7 with an Iphone 11", which he confirmed, and made a derogatory comment about Apple in Reformed Hittite.

So I'll have a guy whose really good with that stuff look at it.

Just before I went out to work on the 1500, I took the boots off I wore to work. They're a pair of what used to be called "paddock boots", but which are now called "lacers", the same way that "ropers" are what used to be called Wellingtons.  I don't really care for them but you can wear them to work in a semi formal sort of way, and they're a pair that my son had that he rapidly outgrew so they have low use on them.  Might as well use them up.

I noticed that the seam has separated at the welt so the outsole is separating from the shoe.

And so I type this entry early in the morning, as all these entries always are.

Just after I ate breakfast.

I don't always eat breakfast (no, this isn't turning into a Dos X advertisement parody), but the paper had come and I was hungry. Oh, I found out when I went out and picked up the paper that I'd left the dome lights on in the 1500 all night. . .   Anyhow, I poured myself some Quaker Oat Square cereal and put in a bunch of raisins.

The I poured the milk.

Yup, completely and totally spoiled milk.

And at least my internal clock is working. Sometime last night I looked at my wrist watch and saw it a 11:15.  It didn't feel like 11:15, but I new it was the middle of night and went back to sleep.  Then again, early this morning I woke up and looked at my watch.

11:15.

The battery was dead.

And that's the second watch battery, and the second time this week I've had that happen.  It was 4:00, which I pretty much knew, so I got up 30 minutes later.

July 17. National Hotdog Day

Brots and Frankfurters right from the grill.

Yes, that day celebrating the nation's decision to put frankfurters between pieces of bread and adorn them with mustard and relish, and thereby not be limited to sausages on potatoes like the oppressed denizens of the colonial mother country.

Blog Mirror: A Hundred Years Ago: "Do Houses Need Kitchens? A Hundred-Year-Old Opinion" Oh my!

Soviet "realist" style painting of good old Vlad Lenin enjoying a meal with the good Russian peasantry.  Oh, the dinner conversation that such a meal would have had.  Right now, we have to imagine Vlad telling the common rural folks about how the Red Army stealing livestock and shooting the neighbors is going to be good for everyone.  Satire aside, the Soviets issued a lot of paintings with rural folks, although this is the only one I've ever seen in which Lenin is portrayed with them.  This must be a fairly early painting as Lenin accurately wears a tie and this painting was early enough that the perfunctory well endowed Russian woman isn't in the painting.  The irony, among others, depicted in such paintings as the rural population strongly resisted Communism and by and large the Communist never managed to grasp the rural mindset, even when they depicted it in romantic terms.

Wow, what a radical question from 1919:

Do Houses Need Kitchens? A Hundred-Year-Old Opinion

Communal kitchens?

No thank you.

Soviet Realism style painting of a rural gathering, this time when Stalin was in power.  Next to good looking blonds, heavily bearded old men are a staple of this sort of painting.

The surprising question came from the March 1919 issue of the Ladies Home Journal, a publication that's still around.  Perhaps I'm thinking of the Journal incorrectly, but I'd never have guess to find such revolutionary sentiments there.

Indeed, the author knew she was proposing something radical.

Shall the private kitchen be abolished? It has a revolutionary sound, just as once upon a time there were revolutionary sounds in such propositions as these: Shall private wells be abolished? Shall private kerosene lamps be abolished? Shall we use ready-to-wear garments and factory-canned vegetables?

What the heck?

It gets even more radical sounding from there;

In the kitchen alone the primitive, solitary, unorganized labor of our ancestors continues to be maintained. When one thinks in terms of a whole town of, say, a thousand homes, a thousand stoves going, and the unpaid labor of wives and mothers who are themselves cooks, it is to be seen that the centralized system is exactly as logical in its certainty of economy as the centralized system any other business.

Nearly the archetype of Soviet Realism's depiction of rural seen.  Hearty, good looking young rustic Russian women at work in piles of harvested grain.  Soviet women in these depictions were uniformly attractive, buxom and often blond.  I don't know if working in piles of harvested grain requires you to be barefoot or not, let alone if this was Soviet women's work, but the artist saw it that way.

Those commenting on the post have noted that in an odd way, the radical propositions set forth by the author did in fact come true, but in a capitalist sort of way.

In a small town, it means the establishment of a central kitchen, or in a city the opening of many neighborhood kitchens. It means the preparation there of breakfast, lunch and dinner just as in a hotel or cafe. But the main industry would be the taking of telephone orders and the delivery of cooked food, hot, at the doors. Delivery would be made by auto; and, closed vans, with openings at the sides and filled with small electric ovens, heated by the power which supplies the car, are not such a far cry.

Okay, there's no central kitchen, to be sure, but there are a lot of fast food joints and lots of places that deliver.  Is Domino's the Central Kitchen No. 1 envisioned by the author?

Probably not.

She seemed to have something more communal in mind.

Well, I'm glad this didn't come to pass.

But it does give rise to an odd thought or two.  In March 1919, Zona Gale was imagining women enslaved in their domestic chores being freed by communal kitchens. And of course she was writing in an era when women doing domestic work was not only uniform, but much more laborious than it is today.  That was about to change, although not as quickly as it could have, which we've addressed here before in what we think is one of our better posts on this site:

Women in the Workplace: It was Maytag that took Rosie the Riveter out of the domestic arena, not World War Two

A virtual icon of the liberated strong woman, Rosie the Riveter proclaimed "we can do it" to the nation and became a symbol of the working woman.  In reality, most Rosie's put the riveter down and actually did return to their prewar lives.  This image pales in comparison to Rockwell's stunning original version.

In the popular imagination, it was World War Two that took women out of the homes, and into careers.  Removed from the domestic scene for the first time by the necessity of the workplace in the greatest war in human history, the story goes, women realized that they could do a man's job and refused to return to their domestic roles.  It's a nice simple story.

It goes on from there.

Domestic machinery, including modern stoves and appliances, were about to arrive, and when it did, that radically changed the amount of hours it required to maintain a home. And with that, women's roles in the society really began to alter.

But there is an interesting irony to all of this.  As noted, in 1919 most women were looking at preparing at least two, if not three, full meals a day, on wood fired stoves, and before modern refrigeration.  As we previously noted;

Folks who cooled food with an ice box, acquired food everyday. If you wanted fresh food, you bought it that day.  Many women went to the market for fresh meat everyday.  There was little choice but to do that.  And ice was delivered periodically also, by a horse drawn wagon.  Both of my parents had recollections of the ice wagon.

Cooking the food was a long precess also. Nothing existed that was already prepared.  People didn't have frozen food to prepare. Canned food, of course, did already exist.  But by and large people had to prepare everything that day, whatever meal was being considered.  And part of that was due to the fact that modern stoves were only coming in during this period.

Refrigeration combined with gas and electric stoves changed all of that.

So the irony?

In 1919, when Zale wrote her article, most people cooked the food or their parents, or more accurately most women cooked the same sort of food that they'd learn to cook from their mothers.  For native born Americans of native born American parents, that was one thing.  For those of recent immigrant stock, that might be another.  In Irish American neighborhoods, that was what we'd regard (perhaps oddly, but not really) as "English Food".  Boiled beef and boiled potatoes, for example.  Italian neighborhoods probably smelled like one gigantic Italian restaurant after 6:00 p.m.  So there would not have been a great deal of variety, but the food in many places would have been good (and in others not so much).

Now, by contrast, we have an incredibly variety of foods and food styles, and we're fascinated by food.  People long for the food of their ethnic ancestors, even if they imagine it being fancier than it often really was.  And they long for food styles and types that seem authentic.  Hours and hours of programming is devoted to such topics on the Food Network, where people can learn recipes that ostensibly feed ranch workers, or which reflect Southern cooking, or which are traditional Italian recipes, and the like.  People appear eager to really cook, looking back, perhaps to an imagined era they miss and a real one Ms. Zale was seeking to escape.

And then they order out.

Of course, in modern terms, a community mess hall, or whatever it would be, would be a nightmare for whoever was afflicted with serving food. Vegans would be demanding everyone eat nothing but celery, or whatever they eat.  People on the latest diets would be demanding full Keto compliance, or something of the kind.  Some would rail against deserts, others demand them.  

It'd be awful.

Well, I'm keeping my kitchen, Comrade.

D'uh

Smoking strong pot daily increases psychosis risk, study finds

No kidding.

That this headline is self evident isn't news. Nor is it that people who were campaigning for the legalization of one more mind numbing drug in a society that's drugging itself into a stupor ignored this, and no doubt will deny it.

Oh well, not to fear, sooner or later the class actions and individual suits will begin, and we benighted benefactors of all social folly will profit.  And then the world, or at least the profits, will be as they should be.

It's Superb Owl Sunday! (Apologies to MKTH).

As well it should be.  Owls, indeed, are superb.

And its high time the nation recognized that, right?

Which is apparently what's finally going on.

Right?

(Apologies to MKTH who made the original observation).

Arctic Owl out on the prairie

Fair sudsy shake, or bum beer rap?

Beer labels featuring Czar Nicholas II and Kasier Wilhelm II.  The "Dictator Series"?

Well, they were powerful monarchs in their own right.  And Czar Nicholas II technically held possession of all of Imperial Russia. Certainly his failure to enact democratic reforms helped foster the radical conditions that brought on the Soviet Union. And the same autocratic tenancies nearly had a similar result in Germany and in fact did foster the conditions that brought about National Socialism.

But Dictator Series beer?  I'm not so sure.

And yes, I tired The Kaiser.  I didn't like it.

New Years' Resolutions for Other People. 2019 Edition

Last year I didn't do this and there was a lot of misbehavior here and there.  Not wanting to be responsible for that sort of thing again, here's my helpful 2019 New Years Resolutions for other folks.

Behave yourself out there.

1.  Monica Lewinsky.

Enough already Monica.

Every Presidential election cycle you reappear, to tell us about your sad tale of woe about how you. . . you know. . . and that means you're now haunted by the memory of. . .

Whatever.  Enough's enough.  No more books, television appearances, whatever.  We get it.  You and Bill Clinton . . . you know.

Do something else noteworthy, if you  must be noteworthy, that doesn't involve the Clinton's or . . . you know.  And don't make an appearance in 2019.  At all.

And it isn't actually necessary that you wear a black dress to remind you of your scandal era appearance.  Don't you have a Nick's jersey or something?

2. The New Yorkers.

The Big Apple.  I'm sure there are a lot of great things about New York, the city, and New York, the state, but right now Schumer, Trump and the Times are making all of you look like a bunch of grade school brats. All the loud posturing may do really well there, but the rest of us are wondering if we can swap Guatemala for New York.  Behave yourself and turn the volume down to about two.

Okay, we don't really mean all New Yorkers.

And certainly not the Yankees, our favorite New Yorkers.

But some of you really need to knock it off . . and you know who you are. The New York Times, Donald J. Trump, Chuckles Schumer, whoever your mayor is, Michael Bloomberg and even Bernie Sanders, who is really a New Yorker (yes, Bernie, we know that you are not from Vermont.  We'd even include Hillary Clinton, who is an ersatz New Yorker.  We've had enough of you already.  We get it.  You're bold, you're brash, you're really irritating.

The entire state of the country can be pretty much summed up by the dual temper tantrums of Donald Trump and Chuckles Schumer. Well, enough of it.  Behave and show up in the news as little as possible in 2019.

Like, as little as possible.

You know which ones you are.

The rest of you we're okay hearing from.

3.  Donald Trump.

Don.  Try emulating Franklin Roosevelt, or Theodore Roosevelt.  They were New Yorkers too.

Okay, New Yorker Donald J. Trump, your going into the third year of your presidency.  In addition to not being in some weird New York yelling match with Chuckles this year, act like a President and quit the entire twitter thing and sudden changes in things. And try to make us suspect your in bed with the Russians less.  A little dignity would go a long ways.

4.  Vlad Putin

Ivan the Terrible.  We don't need a Vlad the Terrible.

You aren't the Czar.  Stop acting like one.

And as you claim to be Russian Orthodox, it may be time for a General Confession.  Just saying.

You're coming up on a term limit by the way.  Surprise us all and step down. Russia will be fine without you. . .in fact it would be a lot better.

5.  The Russian Orthodox Church and the Greek Orthodox Church.

It's hard for us who aren't either to tell what this entire schism is about, but we are certain that schism are sinful.  Ponder it and get it patched up, whatever its about.  And then reconsider the 1054 event.  Enough's enough.

6.  The Wyoming Legislature.

Hand off public lands. We mean it.

7.  Miley Cyrus.

We don't care what you are doing. Quit trying so hard to get our attention.

Same for you Lindsay Lohan.

8.  The Wyoming Legislature

See No. 6.  We really mean it.

And while you're out let's cool silly legislation like trying to keep out the "wrong" kind of people from your own particular political party.

9.  The Movie Industry.

Isn't there anything you can make a movie about that isn't a Marvel cartoon?

Seriously, Marvel cartoons cease to be something worthy of consideration when you are about eight years old.  Stop filming them.

10.  The Movie Going Public

Marvel cartoons? Seriously, like, when you are 30?

11.  Hillary Clinton

There's a Presidential election coming up.  Just say no.

12.  Democrats of age 70 and up.

Come on, let the kids have a chance at running things.  Or at least people in their 60s.

13.  Apple

A year without a new Iphone on the horizon.  Give it a try.

14.  Catherine Rampell.

Okay, it's really cute how you are a Princeton grad and the daughter of two Princeton grads and all, but you've been out of school for a decade now.  Time to go get a real job.  Maybe you can go back to writing political opinions when you've actually lived enough to actually have the experience to write.

The Washington Post and the world will still be there.  Go ahead, get some experience for all that writing.

15. Congress

There are people worthy of being on the Supreme Court who haven't gone to an Ivy League school.  You used to appoint them.

Why not give that a try again?

16.  Kim Jong-un

Hey, it's not too late to come out of the Stalinist theme park still looking good.  Take the border controls down and dissolve North Korea before it becomes even more of the freakish Communist experiment gone horribly wrong than it already is.

17.  Brewers

More IPAs are not necessary.

Try a lager or something.

18.  American public

And a final resolution.

American public, sick and tired of a government that isn't working and problems that don't get solved?

Well do something about it. And doing something about it would mean sending people to Congress who really will do something.  Folks who can read the Constitution, have a long sighted view, and who are willing to tell you that you can't have everything you want.