Thursday, November 23, 2017

He's gone, and not really mourned all that much




Thomas Gobblers, that is.




He was a persistent urban turkey in town.  Quite recognizable.




He was also, like most turkeys, as dumb as a box of rocks.  Unlike most turkeys, however, he had become highly acclimated to people.





Whom he largely disliked, in spite of the fact (yes, we know that you were doing it) some fed him.




He blocked traffic.  He chased and attacked people, particularly women (hmmm. . . .perhaps he was the first to be revealed in a current trend).  He chased the same poor female middle school student every day on her way to class.  He tried to use his claws on a female game and fish biologist. 





He was, quite frankly.  A menace. Even my daughter went from loving him to aggravated with him..








Well, a Star Tribune expose reveals that he's truly disappeared.  He hasn't been seen on anyone front stoop crapping, or roosting in anyone's backyard, or chasing people. . . .mostly women.







Apparently Mrs. Hopper, the female turkey that tried to follow him around (she's crippled on one foot) has been spotted somewhere.  Well, she's better off without him, and I note that he abounded her during that certain season when the other female turkeys came into town.  He had a bad character . . even with the other turkeys.



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