Showing posts with label Standards. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Standards. Show all posts

Friday, December 23, 2022

“Zelenskyy was all rumpled and not wearing a suit, very disrespectful.”

George Washington as Commander of the Continental Army, in the same style of uniform as he wore at the Second Continental Congress in 1775.  Shocking.

Eh?

Did I hear that right?

Are Americans suddenly criticizing the dress of somebody appearing at a public function?

Oh yes, they are, and some are truly verklempt, or appearing to be.  Consider Newsmax's Benny Johnson:

This ungrateful piece of sh*t does not have the decency to wear a suit to the White House -- no respect the country that is funding his survival.

Track suit wearing eastern european con-man mafia.

Our leaders fell for it. They have disgraced us all. What an incredible insult.

Oh my. An American criticizing somebody for how they dress.  It's almost impossible to imagine.

I'm stunned.

I've commented on the decline on the dressing standard here quite a few times.  And I do generally think that appearing in front of Congress, and being at Congress, should require formal dress.  

And not just there, I'd note.

I don't know that I think that required of a man whose living under siege and who is a wartime leader of a country whose capital is within rocket range of what was thought, up until a few months ago, to potentially have the first or second most powerful military on earth.

Indeed, any rational observer of American dress has to know that Americans, generally, dress like slobs.  Quite a few dress like children all the time.  People toddle around in public markets dressed like their mothers just got them up for an early morning trip to the store in their pj's.  People board planes in jammies.  Some men wear knee pants all the time, even during the winter, choosing to affect a dashing infantile presentation in the worst weather.

And more than that, people appear at official functions poorly dressed all the time.

When I was first practicing law, as I noted here before, I didn't really have to tell witnesses how to dress in court.  A while later, however, I'd get asked, and when asked I'd use the Protestant term "Sunday Best", even though I'm not a Protestant, as everyone knew what that meant.  Later, however, I found that was no longer the case and I started to get lucky if people had a clean shirt.

The summer before last I tried a case in Denver in which a downtown Denver jury came in extremely informal clothing.  Shorts, t-shirts, etc.  Only the lawyers, the court staff, and the judge dressed up to the old standard.  A couple of decades ago, this would not have occurred.

Just recently I attended a multiple day contested case hearing in which the lawyers were no longer wearing ties, something that would be a defacto breach of the old official standard that applied to us when we were first practicing.  And I mean the latter.  Ties were part of the official rules for male lawyers up until the time I started practicing, and they basically remain that for courtroom attire.

No, not me, I wore jacket and tie every day.

The panel hearing the matter wore formal clothes, however.  Most of the lawyers, most of the time, did not.  Not that they'd gone full informal, they were still wearing dress shirts and jackets, but no ties.

This is becoming increasingly common.

During the recent January 6 hearings, many of the witnesses fell well below what we would have regarded as the old standard.  Not so low as the rioters, however, who were largely dressed down to the American standard.

I'd include in that dressing down, I'd note, the MAGA trucker's hat.  

I'm not a trucker's cap fan, for the most part, anyhow, with some exceptions.  I will wear real baseball caps from real baseball teams.  Baseball caps, however, are actually not baseball caps, which have longer bills, but an evolution of them that has looked bad from day one.  Thanks to the MAGA cap, now you see guys wearing sports coats and MAGA caps, which looks dumb.

Okay, I suppose we might ask if this is unprecedented?  I truly don't know.

What I can say is that Zelenskyy is a wartime leader. When he was a peacetime leader, he favored dark suits, and was clean-shaven.  Starting with the Russian invasion of his country, and the fighting in his own capital, he began to dress in a quasi military fashion.

He's not the first leader of a democratic country to do that.  I'll omit non-democratic ones, as their leaders affecting military style dress is extremely common.

The best example is Winston Churchill who dressed eclectically frequently.  We like to remember him dressed to the English standard, suit and bowler, but in actuality as he grew older he favored jumpsuits.  In his visits to see FDR he wore them quite frequently, and was photographed by the press wearing them due to their uniqueness.

Churchill, who had started off his professional life as a career British Army officer, but who had official roles with the Admiralty later on, really like to dress in quasi Naval attire, even while Prime Minister, including in official meetings with the heads of foreign states.


Indeed, he truly did.


George Bush, George Bush II, Barack Obama and Donald Trump have all appeared at various times wearing various types of flight jackets, an unmistakenly military item. No, they didn't wear them in Congress, but they wore them.  The two Bush's had both seen military service, as pilots, but President Obama and President Trump never did.

And let's not forget George Washington.

Washington famously appeared in Congress, as a member of the Continental Congress, that assembled to take up the problems with the Mother Country, dressed in the blue uniform of the American Continental militia officers.  

We might regard that as formal wear, but that was the combat uniform of the time.  Our failure to appreciate that is probably due to our inability to read the clothing of the time, but in context, quite frankly, it's shocking.

And it is pretty much what Zalenskyy did earlier this week, save for the fact that he's the besieged president of an embattled country, whereas Washington was implying that maybe the colonies ought to rebel against their established sovereign.

Oh well. The standard is reestablished.  Trumpites, your call is clear.  Off to Brooks Brothers to suit up, literally.

Friday, October 7, 2022

Declined Sartorial Standards. Have we gone too informal?

This post dates back to the first January 6 hearing, which was broadcast in the evening.  

That's quite awhile back, I'll admit.  This has been a lingering thread. But, given some recent observations, it's expanded out.  

Indeed, this is sort of a collision of three influencing items coming together; one the January 6 hearings, one an advertising item, and one being an older (2016?) First Things podcast episode, which I only recently discovered.

In the overall scheme of things, clothing worn in a hearing don't matter much, we think.  We actually had a quote about this just recently from an old work, The Velveteen Rabbit:

When you’re real, shabbiness doesn’t matter.

The Velveteen Rabbit



That's probably the way things ought to be, but . . . well maybe they do.

For some gravitas, let's be blunt.  We're in the midst of a crisis which involves slipped standards.  That slippage includes one group of people who seem to take their oath to the Constitution lightly (which ironically involves a group of people styling themselves "Oath Keepers" who are, in fact, Oath Breakers), and a general decline in civility that reaches up to the highest levels of our society.

It's sad.

The January 6 crisis, that is.

It's disgusting.

And it sort of involves poor dress.

Okay, that's a stretch, but bear with me.

On the first day of the hearings in the audience was a police officer, off duty (or perhaps now retired) who was at the event.  He was there, in the Congressional committee room, wearing a t-shirt.  Another testifying retired policeman was wearing a sports coat and dress shirt, but was there sans tie, a massive tattoo that ran up to his neck clearly visible.  Since then, in these hearings, such dress has been common.  A documentary filmmaker, for example, appeared in a rumpled shirt that looked like it had been slept in the night before.  A former spokesman for the Oath Breakers, who take their name from their massively misconstrued oath to uphold the Constitution which is taken when a person joins the military or a police force, appeared in a jean jacket.

There were exceptions, to be sure, particularly with former members of the government and lawyers, but beyond casual dress was in evidence.  Frankly, not even a decade ago, appearing in Congress dressed like that would have been unthinkable.

And it's not just there.

At one time, if I entered a law office thirty years ago, when I first was practicing, every man in the office would have been dressed appropriately for the season and at least in semiformal clothing.  It would have been impossible to enter a law office of any substantial size and not find at least one man wearing a tie.  Indeed, in a much earlier post on this blog, I noted a quote from The Wyoming Lawyer:
This is certainly no longer the case.  I can enter almost any law office now, any day of the week, and find quite a few male lawyers wearing extremely informal clothing.1 Indeed, the change in standards is, as noted, one of the topics of one of the very early posts on this blog, going back to at least 2011, which is the first year that this blog became really active.  And as the related threads below show, it's come up a lot.

Anyhow, on slipping standards, as recently as about fifteen years ago or so, a person I worked with took enormous offense at a lawyer who appeared in his office wearing shorts and no socks.  It made a permanent impression with him (he was not a lawyer).   And in my own case, I can recall a client, more recently than that, objecting to my wearing boat shoes.

Note that I have distinguished this to male lawyers.  Female lawyers still dress fairly formally, interestingly enough.

The other day I went to a meeting wearing a tie, as it was a meeting between four lawyers and their staffs. Two were dressed informally, one very informally, the other in business casual.  One was dressed relatively formally, but sans tie.

Or, by example, up until recently I always wore a tie at a deposition.  I just started to suspend with them in some instances, as I was definitely the only one wearing one.

To give yet another example, in another context, I went to a funeral just recently.  It was very small.  I came right from work, and as I had the aforementioned meeting, I was wearing a tie, but I had no coat (it was about 100F outside).  At the funeral, there were a few people in rural semi dress, common for rural people, but other people were simply wearing very informal clothing.  I was, once again, the only one with a tie.

Clearly things have changed in the past thirty years.

And not only have they changed, COVID-19, accelerated a change that was already ongoing.  People stayed home, stayed in their jammies, and they haven't dressed back up.  But the change itself was already going on.

Why?

I'm not really sure.  I've seen some written commentary on it, but that commentary tends to fall flat.  One person, for example, related the formality of prior eras to the cost of clothing, but that makes no sense whatsoever, as quite frankly up until the 1950s, clothing was really expensive.

Or, actually, maybe it does.

This is where the second influences for this thread comes in, which was a First Things podcast episode that amounted to simply reading an article for the podcast, with the voice provided by a woman who, if not upper class, certainly had that upper class accent we all used to know, before our Presidents tried to start sounding like extras from Goodfellas.2

Clothing has always served to make distinctions between people, as well as to serve practical functions.  Romans who worse purple did it not simply because they liked the color, but because the dye was expensive, and it showed they were in the elite. 

When clothing was more expensive, middle class Americans, and the middle class everywhere in the Western World, tried to have at least one set of formal clothes that roughly emulated that of the wealthy, as well as those who approached being wealthy and worked indoors.  This showed that they weren't poor.

John Hancock.

And if you couldn't do that, that was probably because you were in fact poor.

And this essentially set the standards for what was worn in certain places.

Now, this doesn't mean that everyone would be dressed as fancifully as John Hancock, in the photograph above.  Indeed, clothing varied quite a bit by status, occupation and region.  But you can take this to mean that a farmer who lived in Maine, let's say, who did well enough, would also have a coat, vest and breeches.

But probably only one set.

And that gets us part of the way to the explanation.  Up until the 1950s, with clothing being expensive, people tended not to have a lot of clothing.  This too set the standard.  Clothing has become so cheap that people now have lots of clothing, and can dispense with concern over what it means to have hardly any at all.

The added part of this is that up until the second half of the 20th Century, most people in the Western world worked in some sort of manual labor.  That didn't mean that they weren't middle class.  Particularly in North America, a person could work in an industrial job as a skilled laborer, or in agriculture, and be solidly middle class.  But people were conscious of their standard.  They wanted to appear as part of the mainstream of society, if they could afford to do so, and most could.

That trend really began to amplify in the early 20th Century, that period in which we recently saw a post regarding whether a young woman would be willing to be escorted by a young man if he omitted tie and vest.


First Things did a nice job of picking this all up, and indeed going back just as far as I did.  What it noted is that seemingly average people, but which we mean in this context people living on the edge of poverty, didn't begrudge the more wealthy wearing finer clothes on formal and even informal occasions, and even sort of expected it.  Be that as it may, at some point, let's say loosely the late 18th Century, the clothing style of the rich and at least middle class began to merge with less distinction between them, at least in so far as daily clothing was concerned.3  Nonetheless, distinctions between the clothing of those who worked with their hands, and those who did not, and based on occasion, remained.  

So, put another way, if you showed up at Church dressed like you had just plowed a field in 1890, it's probably because; 1) you had in fact just plowed a field and 2) you were too poor to get another set of clothes, or 3) if you were Catholic, it was your last chance not to miss Mass.

This same basic set of rules applied to everything. Consider this photograph of Tom Horn's 1902 jury in Wyoming.


Now, there are two things you ought to notice about this photograph of these twelve men.

Everyone is dressed as well as he could be, and better than the average juror today.

And one, in 1902, is black.

Who were they and what did they do:

H. W. Yoder, Ranchman, Goshen Hole
O.V. Seeburn, Ranchman, Goshen Hole
Charles Stamm, Ranchman, Wheatland Flats
T. R. Babbit, Ranchman, LaGrange
H. W. Thomas, Ranchman, LaGrange
G. W. Whiteman, Ranchman, Uva
Amos Sarbaugh, Foreman, Swan Land and Cattle Company
Homer Payne, Cowboy, Swan Land and Cattle Company
Frank F. Sinon, Foreman, White Ranch, Little Horse Creek
E. C. Metcalf, Blacksmith, Wheatland
Charles H. Tolson, Porter, Cheyenne
J. E. Barnes, Butcher, Cheyenne

Mr. Tolson was probably the black juror4 

Now, the last jury I drew, I drew in Denver, Colorado.  More specifically, Denver County, Denver, Colorado. This jury in 1902 makes that jury look. . . well. . . .slovenly.

More on that to follow.

What happened?

According to First Things, the clothing distinction carried on right into the 1960s, but then crashed into 1967's Summer of Love.

Mounted Policeman in San Francisco at an anti-war demonstration in 1967.5   By BeenAroundAWhile at en.wikipedia, CC BY-SA 3.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=47396940

Pinning a huge clothing shift on a single year is probably a bit much, but there's some evidence to suggest it's at least true in a larger sense.  Maybe not 1967, but maybe 1966 to 1980, with steady erosion the entire time.

So why?

Let's talk about the GI Bill again.

But before we do that, let's talk about the mid 20th Century standard of dress a bit more carefully.  And in doing that, let's look at a current attempted commercial revival of that standard, but none other than Ralph Lauren.

We see that here.


Now, what exactly are we seeing here? 

These are uploaded and linked in photographs from the Ralph Lauren collection recalling Morehouse and Spillman colleges in the mid 20th Century. They still exist, and donations from the sale of this clothing goes to those traditionally black colleges.


And not just that, here's another Lauren collegic collection.


This no doubt takes us all back to those heady youthful college days, right?

Ummm. . . well probably not if you graduated any time in the last several decades.

But Lauren actually isn't that far off in how college students of the mid 20th Century actually dressed.


And those Morehouse and Spillman students of that era, they weren't merely complying with the standard of dress of the era, they were engaged in a radical act by dressing that way.  I.e, by dressing to the Middle Class standard, they were proclaiming that they were not, and had no intention of being, somebody's second class hired hand.

Okay, let's deep dive on this a little deeper.

The First Things article points out that while, over a long stretch of time, dress became more informal, it still retained formal elements in an unchallenged fashion up until the 1960s, when this really began to erode.  Indeed, just recently, and coincidentally, this was illustrated in something I happened to watch on television, that being an older documentary, narrated by a very young Jeff Bridges, regarding a Creedance Clearwater Revival tour of Europe.  The documentary went into the history of the band, which was at that time fairly short.  The group originated in El Cerrito California, a Bay Area city, and performed under the name The Blue Velvets, Vision, and then the Golliwogs, before changing its name to the final variant. As early as 1964 they had a record contract.

The band basically had a mid 1960s hiatus due to the military service of three of its members. The remarkable thing about this is that in 1964 photos of the members show them all turned out with short hair, sports jackets, and ties. They look like, well. . . a collection of young college men of that era.  By the late 1960s, however, they had their familiar appearance.

Creedance Clearwater Revival in 1968.

The clothing standards had changed.

But why?

They'd actually begun to change in the 1950s, but that didn't create a switch overnight. And in fairness, the change of the 1960s didn't change everything overnight, either.

In the 50s, the challenge to the existing clothing standards started with certain sections of "rebellious" youth sporting leather jackets and Levis.  At the time, that identified them, intentionally, with the working class, the only class that had worn blue jeans routinely, and also with the post Second World War motorcycle gangs.  It caused a spike in popularity of blue jeans, however, which rapidly entered general wear among teenagers and younger adults.  This carried over into the late 1960s, when widespread youth protests movements broke out everywhere. But that time, as a symbol of uniform rejection of their parents' generation, a section of the Boomers adopted really outlandish styles, while others simply adopted styles that, once again, reflected working men's clothing to some extent.  The rebellion became wide enough that the dress code was basically cracked, and formal clothing attempted to mimic it, modifying the style of suits and semiformal clothing of the era.

While the fashion industry did attempt to retain the suit, and successfully for a while, the reaction was with designs so hideous that they would ultimately be self-defeating. And by that time, the damage had been done.  It had particularly been done among the younger demographic, which would basically grow up suitless.

I'm an example of that.  From photographs, I know that my father frequently wore suits in the 1950s. although annual photos from the 40s show that not occuring at all in high school.  No ties either.  I recall him having a pretty nice suit in the 1960s and early 1970s, although I don't recall him wearing it often.  In the 1970s, when he left for his office, he normally wore a sports coat and tie, and I very much remember that.  Indeed, he worse wingtip shoes nearly every day.  But as a kid in school, at no time did I ever have clothing that required a tie or even a dress shirt.  I recall a blue button down shirt being bought for me when I was in grade school for some reason, and a double-breasted blue blazer.  It was probably for a wedding, but I can barely remember ever wearing it.

By junior high, I lacked any such formal clothing at all, and that's significant.  I went into high school the same way.  The only time you ever saw any kid wearing a tie, for anything, in high school, was when the JrROTC cadets had to wear their uniforms, which was once a week.  I got all the way through high school without ever wearing a tie to anything, including by my recollection my high school graduation, at which point my parents tried to by me some dress pants. Those pants were horrible powder blue polyester pants, the only thing readily available, and I only wore them once.

Dancing Zoot Suiters. Apparently the photographer was so fascinated he forgot to include the heads of the dancers in the photograph.

The first time I can recall wearing a tie, post high school, was in basic training. The Army dress uniform at that time was the Green Pickle Suit, and it had a black regular tie you had to learn how to tie.  The current Army dress uniform still does.  As a college undergrad, I took the position that I was "never going to have a job that required wearing a tie", which means that there were still those who did that every day.  Indeed, college professors often did at that time, and that was common, I'll note, all the way through to my law school graduation in 1990.

Still, I didn't wear ties very often.  Probably the only time in my undergrad years that I did was when I was attending weddings or funerals.  The first suit I owned was one that I bought, I think, in 1986 for a friend's wedding.  

All of this is somewhat significant, by way of an illustration, as during this time I would have done things that only twenty years prior would have required coat and tie, although I never thought of it in that fashion.  Simply going to university would have.  Going out on dates would have.  When I was an undergrad, however, the only thing that really did were attending weddings and funerals.

For some of that time, the reason for this was that I was a geology major, and as a geology major I hung out mostly with other geology majors.  Everyone I knew was outdoorsy, and the clothing we had was outdoorsy.  But by the late 1980s the expectation that a young man (it was less true for young women) would have any sort of "dress up" clothing had simply evaporated.

When I was first practicing law it remained, however, ad we were expected to wear ties most days, unless we were only going to be in the office, or it was summer during which summertime office rules allowed for polo shirts, although they were tolerated only with the greatest expressed reluctance by the office manager.  In court, in the summer, we could dispense with the jacket, but never the tie.  But this was the office.  When I started dating my wife, I never wore formal clothes, and as far as I can tell, she never expected me to.

Now, due to this evolution, a lot of people don't even have formal clothing. And it's eroded enormously even in the law.  People go to depositions, for example, dressed in jeans and button down shirts, and by people, I mean the lawyers.  At an administrative hearing I was at the other day, at least a couple of lawyers were there without ties, something that up until very recently would never have occurred.

During the January 6 hearings, mentioned way above, some of the witnesses were in t-shirts, disheveled button downs, and very few of the men wore ties.  Up until very recently, it's simply impossible to imagine somebody appearing in front of Congress in a t-shirt, let alone without a tie.  It would have been regarded as rude and disrespectful, which is frankly just how it struck me.

I mentioned the Denver County jury above, and this provides an interesting example.  Denver County is downtown Denver, and it's the heart of the city's financial and business district.  If a jury had been drawn from there as late as the 1960s, the men would have largely showed up in at least coat and tie and the women in something relatively formal.  By the 70s, this wouldn't have been true, but their dress would have still been fairly clean and not extraordinarily casual. [1]

In the 2020s, however, jurors show up in shots and t-shirts, to a large degree.

So the question becomes, does all of this matter?

I think that it does.  Here's why.

We've gone over it before, but something deep inside of human beings causes there to be an instinct in regard to dress and message.  All peoples, everywhere, exhibit this behavior.  Even societies that have a large scale lack of clothing do this, even it comes down to wearing something ornamental.  Men dress differently than women, everywhere, and everywhere people dress differently based on their status and occupation in life.

Some societies have attempted to purposely destroy this from time to time, the Red Chinese following the Revolution providing a particularly notable example.  Everyone dressed in a suit like Mao, men and women, assuming that they weren't working in a field.  The idea was to wipe out class distinction.

It didn't work, and ultimately the Chinese gave up on it.  Now, the Chinese elite wear suits.

As part of the distinctions that this brings, it also singles out those of particularly special distinction.  And beyond that, it signals when certain events are particularly significant.

We've really lost that.

And in losing it, oddly enough, we've separated society at large all the more from people whom still retain the standard for some distinct reason.  Clerics, for example, continue to wear black suits and Roman collars, as they have for eons. But if you see a photograph of, let's say, a Catholic Priest in the 1940s, except when in his vestments, the distinction between him and his flock, while real, isn't all that great as a rule.  Now he's singled out like no other.

And that quite frank is something that's overlooked in this area.  It's common to hear that the collapse of the dress code leveled things out as now everybody looks the same, more or less, even though that's not really true.  Indeed, those who work in heavy industry don't look the same, as their clothing remains highly specialized, and that's true of others as well. But what isn't noticed as much is that as some people remain in occupations which, for various reasons, a formal code appears in some setting, those who could have claimed some portion of that status have lost it, at least a little.  Now those who must wear it are set out as truly separate and apart, as if they're truly above everyone else.

And the loss of the standard has contributed, a bit, to the concept that nothing is really specialized, or special, to some degree.

Court provides a good example of both.  A small businessman appearing in court with a lawyer, or a mechanic, may not have had a suit that was as nice as the lawyers, but if he had one, it said that he was a professional too, just of a different type.  The lack of one suggests he's not.  And court is a special setting, which deserves acknowledgement of its status, just as Congress, or a legislature, or perhaps numerous other settings are, or should be.

But is there any going back, at least in part?

If there is, it isn't obvious.

Footnotes:

1.  This is much less true of female lawyers, for some reason. They largley continue to adhere to a higher dress code.

2.  I've written about this before, but its intersting how this applies so much to New Yorkers.  In the early 20th Century the United States had two Presidents from New York, both Roosevelts, who had very distinct upper class New York accents.  Their speech was distinct and polished.  In contrast, we just had President Trump who has affected the odd Goodfella style of speech mixed in with a personal style of speaking that's odd and sometimes oddly childish.

3.  Distinctions remained with very formal clothing, which was the province of the well to do.  If you look at wedding photographs, for instance, taken up until the 1970s, average middle class men tended to wear a suit that they already had, as did the male wedding party.  Women's clothing was different, but men came in a suit that they othewise wore to other things, including work.  If you see tuxedos in evidence, it's an indication of wealth.

4.  Porters were often African American, and all Pullman Porters were.  The reason for the latter has been explained to me by a person who remembered them by way of "people liked to be served by black people", so it was racist in nature, but in a very odd fashion in that the job paid fairly well.   The Pullman company's porters actualy contributed to the rise of the black middle class both through their pay, but also because they traveled widely and were a source of information to African Ameican communities.  They also interacted with European Americans routinely and becuse of their sharp appearance generally left a good impression. They remained an all black institution up until the Pullman company went out of business in 1969.

5. This photograph is also intersting in that it shows how much police uniforms have changed since the 1960s.  These mounted policemen are all wearing leather jackets, something that became very common with policement starting in the 1920s, depending upon their roles.  At first heavily associated with motorcycle policemen, by the post World War Two period some departments issued leather jackets to every patrolman.  Chicago actually issued a fur collared leather jacket up until 1965, at which time they went to another one that was more like a Second World War flight jacket which was issued until 2013.  Current mounted policemen would wear a helmet, rather than a peaked cap, something that came into mounted police use following World War Two.

Related threads:

































Wednesday, September 21, 2022

The Post World War Two increase in divorces. . . maybe.*

Monroe's third marriage, Miller's second (he'd go on to a third).

The other day, I had a thread discussing the youthful (16 years old) marriage of the then Norma Jean Baker to James Dougherty.1   It was this post, here:

Friday, June 19, 1942 . James Dougherty and Norma Jean Baker marry.

The marriage didn't last.

We know the rest of the story, of course.  Norma Jean would divorce Dougherty while he was serving overseas in the Navy so that she could sign a modeling contract.  She changed her name to Marilyn Monroe, became a famous actress, married and divorced Joe DiMaggio and then Arthur Miller, and then died from a sleeping pill overdose in the early 1960s.  Her life, really, was fairly tragic.2 

She's still regarded, justifiably, as one of the greatest beauties of all time.


It's tempting to sort of sum up her early marriage history, the first one, as a wartime phenomenon.  Youthful marriage, followed by long separation featuring wartime female employment, followed by divorce.

And then followed by societal expansion of divorce.

And certainly there's some evidence to support that.

Indeed, the Monroe story is hardly unique.  Bill Mauldin provides us another example.  

Like Monroe, his early years were a mess, with messed up parents and a lack of parental supervision quite frequently.  He also didn't finish high school, although a large percentage of men did not at the time.  And he also ended up married three times.

He married his first wife, Norma Jean Humphries (Jean) in 1942, before he deployed overseas.  Neither she nor Mauldin would be faithful during his wartime absence, and they quickly divorced upon his return.  Indeed, the length of their marriage was nearly identical to the Dougherty's and Monroe's, although infidelity did not play a role in the latter's divorce.3



The phenomenon of wartime marriages followed by marital trouble was so common that it became a film trope.  It shows up in the great immediate post-war drama The Best Years Of Our Lives, with the Fred Derry character's marriage falling apart immediately after the war.  Indeed, divorce is portrayed as the solution to Derry's problem, with a youthful female character played by Teresa Wright actually plotting to break his unsuccessful marraige up.  Infidelity shows up in The Man In The Gray Flannel Suit, although divorce does not.



Well, just the way wars work, right?   Maybe World War Two is responsible for our current situation regarding marriage, shacking up, and divorce?

Maybe.

And maybe not, and this might not really have quite the story that it might seem at first.

The current state of the law regarding divorce is a "no fault" regime. This wasn't always the case.  Indeed, an entire highly developed set of laws existed regarding marriage, promises of marriage and divorce prior to the second half of the 20th Century.  No state had no-fault divorce until California adopted it in 1969.

That development came about in no small part as divorce was becoming more common.  But note, that was 1969.

Not 1949.

And I had never read, nor could I find, a recitation of a post World War One spike in divorces.  Although, while working on this entry, the following showed up from 1922 on Reddit's 100 Years Ago Subreddit:


So apparently there was a perception of divorce rates really climbing.  I posted a query on that, and a respondent noted that it had in fact climbed from a tiny 1 for every 1,000 to 1.7 for every 1,000 marriages by 1928.  It was around 2 per 1,000 in 1940.  It was 3.4 by 1947, but dropped back down to about 2.2 by 1960.  It started t climb in the early 70s, and really started to jump by the late 1970s.

Given that, World War One didn't seem to have much of an impact.  If anything, the war caused a spike in post-war marriages as American doughboys brought home French, English and Russian (yes, Russian) brides home with them.  For that matter, a few who had served in the brief post-war occupation brought German wives home with them, although fraternization between Americans and Germans was extremely heavily discouraged for a variety of reasons.    One British study noted:
Unmarried motherhood increased during the war, probably because the absence of men at war prevented marriages following the woman’s pregnancy. There was continuity before, during and after the war in levels of unmarried cohabitation and parenthood, mainly due to the restrictive divorce laws in England and Wales, though not in Scotland. Liberalization of the divorce law in 1925 and 1937, mainly due to pressure from newly enfranchised women, increased divorces only to a small degree because divorce remained difficult, expensive and stigmatizing for women. Deaths of men at war perpetuated but did not create a female majority in the population – women had long outlived and outnumbered men – and it had only a small effect on marriage patterns. The demographic effects of the war were limited, most significant was reduction in infant mortality due to government efforts to replace men killed in the war. The war permanently expanded employment opportunities mainly for middle-class women, and, after gaining the vote in 1918, women were more active in campaigning for social and legal reforms to increase gender equality and improve social conditions.
And, for example, this article from Colorado discussed Russian war brides coming into Colorado.


Leadville Herald Democrat, June 16, 1920.  I've seen others discussing French war brides coming in, in numbers, to South Carolina.  

Clearly, the war brought about a lot of marriages of couples who hadn't known each other all that long, and who weren't from the same cultures.  No gigantic corresponding spike in divorces seems to have occurred at any point.

And for that matter, while World War Two did result in a spike in divorces, it was marginal.  Divorce rates had climbed to 2 per 1,000 by 1940 and were up to 3.4 per 1,000 by 1947, but they fell back down to around 2.2 for a long time thereafter, and it wasn't until the 1970s when they began to climb.

So, what are they now?

2.3 per 1,000.

So what gives?

Indeed, is there a story here at all, or is the "skyrocketing divorce rate" just a long, really persistent, myth?

Let's start with the status quo ante.

Prior to the second half of the 20th Century, divorce was obtainable in the United States and most English-speaking countries, Ireland being the exception, together with Newfoundland in Canada.4   Indeed, we might note that divorce was obtainable in most of the protestant countries of Europe, something that isn't surprising if we consider the history of the Reformation.5   Be that as it may, however, there was no such thing, generally, as no-fault divorce pretty much anywhere until Soviet Russia introduced it in 1917, something which is quite telling, really.6

The body of law that governed male/female relationships, to obfuscate it a bit, has been collectively referred to as the "heart balm laws", but frankly, there was nothing romantic or warm and fuzzy about them. They were very serious statutes that bluntly took into the account the realities of those relationships and biology.  Indeed, they were much more realistic on those topics and the fundamental nature of marriage than the law today, including recently evolutions in the law that Obergefell has brought about. On that, they were wholly unconcerned with love.  They were pretty concerned, however, with sex, and what sex could bring about.

And indeed we see that, albeit in a disturbing way, in the story of the nuptials of Chester Linkfield and Ernestine Burnett.7  But not only there, we see it in one of the retained sets of laws that remain in effect.

Because this has taken me so long two write, I read of an even more youthful marriage than the one involving Marilyn Monroe just the other day, on Reddit.  It was this one.


Yikes.

The news story was apparently regarded as an odd human interest story, so it made it all the way to print in New Zealand, where it actually gave more details:


Yikes again.

FWIW, for most of Western society, including American society, marriages involving very young couples, let alone teenagers, were uncommon.  Marriage ages change a lot less than people generally think, as we reported here:

Let's take a table that somebody else has generated and see if it changes things at all:

Year --- Men --- Women
2015 ----29.2 ----27.1
2010 --- 28.2 --- 26.1
2000 --- 26.8 --- 25.1
1990 --- 26.1 --- 23.9
1980 --- 24.7 --- 22.0
1970 --- 23.2 --- 20.8
1960 --- 22.8 --- 20.3
1950 --- 22.8 --- 20.3
1940 --- 24.3 --- 21.5
1930 --- 24.3 --- 21.3
1920 --- 24.6 --- 21.2
1910 --- 25.1 --- 21.6
1900 --- 25.9 --- 21.9
1890 --- 26.1 --- 22.0

But what a strange story.8

Obviously there was more to this story than the press reported, although there are hints at it.  Fighting a duel for the affections of a twelve-year-old is exceedingly odd under any circumstances, however.  Linkfield was shot in the duel, but apparently only Carpenter was locked up.  Why? Dueling was illegal under any circumstances at the time.  Did getting shot suffice for Linkfield's punishment, or was Carpenter regarded as the aggressor?

Also hinted at, Linkfield and the young object of his affection obviously met back up, as she was almost certainly a pregnant 13-year-old when they married, which is more than a little icky.  As the young husband, married to a true child bride, apparently had no means of support for a family, they moved in to his parent's home.

It's hard to imagine this story developing this way today.  Almost impossible, in fact.  And that it was treated somewhat as a love story in the paper is a bit hard to fathom.

If you look at the Reddit entry, you'll see that by and large people were pretty shocked by the 1922 story, and I can include myself in that group.  As always with such stories, you get a minority who will come in with the "well, back in the day everyone married young", or "at one time child marriages were common".  Nope, they weren't, and they haven't been since the Church decreed that marriage could only occur with consent and in particular with the consent of the bride.9

Burnett did marry Linkfield, as noted, which gets us back to the law, as noted when we took this diversion. The retained set of laws, and we'll get more into the law in a moment, are those dealing with "statutory rape", the concept that below a certain age people cannot consent to sex.  How this works varies by state, and indeed it changed in my own state over time.  I haven't kept up with it as it's outside my area of the law, but all US jurisdictions and probably every Western World jurisdiction has a law that essentially says that below a certain age, consent doesn't matter, it's rape.  Some modify this with age provisions, such as if the couple is both below the age of consent but close in age, or if the couple is close in age, etc.  As noted, I haven't kept up with it, and I'm not going to bother to look it up.

All states also have provisions that hold that below a certain age, you can't consent to marriage.  Again, I'm not going to see what it currently is here, but at least when I was first practicing law, you had to have your parent's permission if you were younger than 18 years of age, and the court's permission if you were younger than 16 years of age.

As noted above, I have known some people who were married younger than age 18, but frankly the youngest of them would be about 60 years of age now.  This isn't common at all, and it hasn't been at any point in my lifetime.  It hasn't been for eons, frankly, and it's a super rarity now.  The very few people I know, outside of one example, who fit in this category would be up in their 80s or 90s now, but for the fact that they're dead.

Save for one example I know of in which a couple, originally from Louisiana, were married when he was 19, and she was 13.

That's strange, to be sure.  She wasn't, I'd note, "in trouble".

Anyhow, I digress. The point here is that if you read the story of Linkfield and Burnett, it's pretty clear that she was "in trouble" and the options that were left were to marry her off to the father or send him to the pokey.  Marrying her to the father relieved, at some point, the parents of Linkfield and Burnett and provided some sort of family for the child.  Sending Linkfield to reform school or jail would have left her in desperate straights, along with the child, and would have imposed a financial burden on her parents and probably a hostile financial burden on his parents.

Not as romantic as the news stories made it appear, but then they were written at a time when the readers understood all of this without having to have anyone explain it.

Which brings us to shacking up, or um, cohabitation.

These laws changed over time, but if you combine the civil law and the statutory law, generally what you find is that cohabitation was illegal in some places, or it resulted in common law marriage in others.  A promise to marry, an engagement, was legally enforceable and "calling off an engagement" could result in a civil action by the party that had not sought to call it off (breach of promise).  Divorce was generally allowable, but there had to be a cause, such as abandonment or cruelty, to justify it.

So what was the thinking?

It's pretty straight forward, actually.

Rather than the current mushy thinking about male/female relationships, our ancestors knew that at a certain point in time in our development, once we passed our childhoods, we were male and female, and attracted to the opposite, and at some point that could lead to children.

We've dealt with this before, so I won't go into it in great detail here, but laws regarding men, women, marriage and divorce, and everything related to the topic, was, in some way or another, related to that.  Cohabitation was illegal or brought about "common law" marriages, as the law didn't want society to be responsible for any children that came about by way of the relationship.  In other words, the law operated to attempt to force men to comply with their obligations to their offspring, and to protect the long term economic best interest of those offspring.

Breach of promise type actions existed, as there was a general assumption that a single woman who had accepted a proposal of marriage might now be "damaged goods" that other suitors would avoid.  In a world in which female employment was harder to come by, particularly good paying jobs that didn't involve manual labor, there was a fear that a woman who had been engaged, with her fiancé backing out, would be left "ruined".  Burnett, for example, certainly would have been and likely would have had to face life as an extremely young mother basically alone, her moral status irreparably tarnished, and her child a problem for any potential suitor that wouldn't have existed had the father been absent due to death, rather than disinterest.

And this all ties into another set of statistics, part of which involve cohabitation, and part which don't.

Let's go back to the "divorce rate".

Frankly, the divorce rate was probably never as high as people imagined it was, and according to even a news story that has it a lot higher than Census Bureau reports, it reached a fifty-year low last year.  Not that this would be great, as 1972, fifty years ago, is when things started to climb.  

Percentage of divorces per 1,000 is one figure, but the overall number of marriages that end in divorce is quite another.  

When we look at the start of the 20th Century and the overall low divorce rate, that equated pretty well, without really looking it up, with a generally low overall percentage of the population that divorced  I.e., some marriages ended in divorce, but they were few, and the implications were pronounced.  Being tagged a "divorcee" wasn't a good thing. This remained the case up until the 1970s really, although to less of a degree than had previously been the case. 

Indeed, by way of a couple of examples, when I was young there was a neighboring couple that my parents really liked, but it was noted from time to time that they'd both been divorced prior to their current marriage. My parents didn't hold it against them, but it was sort of a mark against them.  It was an odd character defect, if you will.

As another example, my mother was friends with a woman who had at one time worked for a friend of my father's.  My father's friend was divorced and remarried, which was likewise regarded as a bit of a character defect.  My mother's friend held it bitterly against him, her former employer, even though she was herself divorced.  She may have felt liberty to criticize as her divorce from her husband, whom I understood to be an alcoholic, may have left her raising their son alone, but she never remarried. She remained faithful, in essence, to her marriage by not remarrying.

Or, as a final example, two of the kids I was friends with in grade school lived in homes in which their mother's had divorced their fathers and remarried.  It was regarded as so unusual it was a topic among parents, and we were all very conscious of it.

Now, meeting divorced and remarried people are very common.  I'm sure hardly anyone can't list several friends or associates that haven't been divorced, and some have been divorced and remarried.

It may be just me, but I think I see a bit of a trend here as well.

I know several people that have been married multiple times, but interestingly, this seems to be something that applies mostly to a generation that cuts off at age 50.  I may be wrong, but I don't really see younger generations getting serial divorces.  Part of the reason for that may be the rise in cohabitation.  I'll go onto that in a moment, but of those whom I know who have had serials marriages, a couple of them probably fit into that category of too immature to marry when they first married, and maybe when they married a second time, but the third time it really stuck.  On the other hand, some just seem to have a light attachment to the meaning of marriage, or they have bad skills in regard to whom they have chosen to marry.

Some would now claim that the rise of cohabitation has caused the drop in the phenomenon noted immediately above, but there's no evidence of that.  On the contrary, statistically it's been shown cohabitation does not in any fashion make subsequent marriages more stable. Quite the opposite is true, it increases the instances of divorce.

And indeed, cohabitating men in particular never quit looking.  It's been shown that by not being bound, they really don't regard themselves as bound.  Quite a few, to at least some degree, still are heding their bets just a little.

And in someways this takes us to what we might call "stealth divorces".

As we noted above, cohabitation was generally illegal, certainly in the 19th Century, and in some places in the early 20th Century.  It was societally regarded as absolutely scandalous.  That taint began to wane with the Sexual Revolution.

Now, we don't want to fall into the error of claiming that before 1968 everyone's behavior was absolutely correct.  Having said that, studies in more recent years have shown that the groundbreaking sexual studies of the late 40s and early 50s were erroneous to a whopping degree.  Indeed, well into the 1950s, most men and women had no sexual relations with anyone until they were married.  This was the societal standard, and it was very largely adhered to.  Not absolutely, but fairly well.l

The Second World War clearly made some inroads into that, and frankly the Great War had dented it as well, but after both wars the standards revived, even if they'd temporarily eroded during the war.  They started to steadily erode starting in 1954 following the December 1953 release of Playboy magazine, and that definitely had a cultural impact that's apparent in films of the late 50s and early 60s.  The 1960s, however, bust things wide open, which exploded all over the 1970s in the form of the Sexual Revolution.

It's a fairly short line from sex outside of marriage to cohabitation, but here again it didn't happen instantly.  Even as late as the 1980s when I was in university, cohabitation was regarded as semi scandalous society wide.  People really didn't know how to take it, and where it occurred it was pretty uniformly regarded as a temporary arrangement.   Again, by way of personal recollections, one politically highly liberal friend of mine was scandalized by the conduct of a female roommate who, well, we will skip it, but this is in the mid 1980s.  Of my college friends who married about that time, only one had "lived with" his girlfriend prior to their marriage, although their story presents an interesting one in terms of trends.

By the late 90s things were really changing in this regard, and you started to run into couples, for the first time, that seemingly cohabitated with no thought of getting married.

Having said that, some of this trend, like much in the way of widely reported social trends, may be exaggerated.  Nonetheless, the trend is there, and in 2019 the Census Bureau found:

In 2018, 15 percent of young adults ages 25-34 live with an unmarried partner, up from 12 percent 10 years ago.

It further reported:

Fifty years ago, in 1968, living with an unmarried partner was rare. Only 0.1 percent of 18- to 24-year-olds and 0.2 percent of 25- to 34-year-olds lived with an unmarried partner, according to the Current Population Survey. 
The measurement of cohabitation from 1968-1995 was less precise. The estimate came from an indirect measure of opposite-sex partners sharing living quarters, and the late 1960s through the early 1970s had particularly low reports of cohabitation. 
Also, when comparing 2008 to 2018, years in which the Current Population Survey asked a direct cohabitation question, cohabitation only increased for 25- to 34-year-olds and slightly decreased for 18- to 24-year-olds. 
So, although cohabitation has increased for young adults over the last 50 years, it is important to note the limitations in measurement and that certain periods of time did not produce increases in unmarried young adults living together. 
In contrast to the rising rates of cohabitation, the proportion of young adults who are married has declined over time. 
Today, 30 percent of young adults ages 18-34 are married, but 40 years ago, in 1978, 59 percent of young adults were married.

So, what the Census Bureau found was that, basically, cohabitation had jumped enormously for young adults in fifty years, but was decreasing for other sections of the population.  Also of note 59% of young adults, if we run the "young" criteria up to age 34, which is a questionable way of doing it (at one time 34 was actually considered "middle age", and not all that long ago) were married.  Now, 30% of the population in that age range is, although it's still the case overall that the majority of Americans live in married households.

That is quite the change, but I'd also note that it actually sort of, but only sort of, replicates a situation that had existed in the 19th Century when "common law" marriages came about.  That legal creation was created by the courts to deal with the byproducts of just such unions and to handle the legal problems they created.  And in looking at that, we an find a surprising number of notable common law marriages in the United States in the 19th Century, particularly in the wilder regions of the country.

Indeed, looking back even further, it's hard not to recall that it was not until well into the Middle Ages that marriages needed to be witnessed at all.

Some of the current cohabitation going on is basically in the nature of common law marriages, even if not recognized as such.  This is particularly true of the ones that use the extremely irritating word "partner" to describe the putative spouse.  Others are just examples of people playing house, and there's everything in between.  We note it here, however, as these couples do split up, and often without any sort of intervention of the law at all, and therefore they create a sort of stealth divorce.

Some of how this works overall, as a social observer, is interesting.  Some of these couples get around to marrying later, some never do, but with some it's almost impossible not to view them as common law marriages.  It speaks in part, however, to the breakdown in standards in society, but this thread is already broad enough without going there.

So what is going on here?

It's actually pretty hard to say.

When I started this thread off, I had intended to look at the often claimed link between "marry in haste" marriages during World War Two leading to a breakdown in marriage itself, which isn't a theory that I came up.  However, much like the popular theory that "World War Two caused women to enter into the work force forever" claim, it really doesn't have the facts to back it up.  There was in fact a jump in divorce rates after the war, but it wasn't titanic, and overall societal divorce rates returned to what they had been just before the war and remained there into the late 1970s.  And frankly, attitudes towards divorce, while they changed, didn't change all that much until the 80s.

So if the war played a role, it was indirect.

What does seem to have played a role, however, was the combined impact of increased wealth and a big focus on materialism, and we're still living with that, although it seems to be breaking down in recent years, with a boost in that from COVID 19.

For most of human history marriage played a variety of roles, but the big societal one was making sure that children were protected, and then widows were. This doesn't mean that marriage doesn't have an important religious aspect to it, particularly in Apostolic Christian churches.  It does.  But societies, and by this we mean all societies, regulated male/female interactions for the reasons noted above, as society didn't want the tribe, the village, the shire, or whatever, to be stuck with the burden of raising children or taking care of widows.

There was really no thought at all to doing so until the post-war era, for the most part.  "Mistakes of nature", as children born out of wedlock were sometimes referred to, were a disaster, for the most part, for the economic well-being of the mothers, save for the instances when the fathers were well-to-do.  Contrary to what progressives like to claim, however, the overwhelming majority of women took the children to term.  Giving the children up for adoption was a very common option, particularly for teenage and early twenties mothers, who were often "sent away" for a time until the children could be delivered in hopes of trying to salvage some element of the girl's reputation.  Quick marriages, or the proverbial "shotgun marriage", were also solutions, and there's some question of whether the Linkfield marriage described above may have been one of those.

Anyway you looked at it, abortion and living with heavy public support were not options.  As readers here will note, I don't feel that abortion should be now.  But its undeniable that public money to aid the mothers of unwed children, and the children, came about following the introduction of the Great Society.  Indeed, the often heard claim of people for sympathy about a protagonist that "she's an unwed working mother" just would not have been made prior to that time, and probably not until the 1990s really.

What also came about was a change in sexual behavior due to the Sexual Revolution, with the Quartermaster of the Revolution being pharmaceutical birth control.  We've dealt with that before here as well, but the overall mix of birth control combined with Playboy's separation of the concept that sex can result in children really hit in the 1960s, right at the time that a youth rebellion was underway.  None of the results would have been possible without that combination, and added to it was the post World War Two massive increase in societal wealth.

The huge increase in societal wealth meant that it was possible for government to imagine, if erroneously, that it could address the desperate plight of unmarried mothers and their children, which came partially, but only partially, true, just at the same time that the Sexual Revolution broke down sexual mores. 

And added to that was the change in people's views about what their own lives were for that accompanied the backside of the youth rebellion.  

As we've noted here before, prior to the 1960s, and very much prior to World War Two, the United States may have been a capitalistic society, but it was also one which, for most people, was actually family oriented.  When the authors of I'll Take My Stand assaulted the New Deal, they in part emphasized that, as it was so much the case.  I.e., they expected a sympathetic audience to the argument that Rooseveltian capitalism/liberal government was super pro business and was destroying familial leisure.  A person can take that for what it's worth, but in the 1970s that really became true.  As late as the 1970s and 1980s, you'd still occasionally hear parents encouraging their children in post high school academic careers on the basis that "you'll get a good job, so you can support a family".  

I haven't heard that argument made for decades now.

Now, people are urged to get a good job as it'll produce a high income and that means lots of stuff. And that's the real difference between then and now.

People now routinely leave friends and family for their careers, and in doing so abandon their spouses and "others".   Since the 1970s, and very much since then, societal propaganda has been full of "fulfilling career" arguments, arguing, particularly to women, that their path to a meaningful life and a sense of self-worth is solely linked to their careers and completely internalized.

Of course, another concept that didn't exist is that people had to approach something really serious, sex, as entertainment and that they were doing something wrong if they weren't acting like alley cats in heat in at least a certain point in their life.

The basic psychology of sex is pretty well known in our species, and it does in fact vary enormously by species.  As we've gone into that before, we'll not plow into it again, but sex serves more than reproductive purposes in our species, which is one of the reasons we're one of the few mammals that will act sexually in spite of a female not being "in season".  Cattle, for example, don't act that way.  If a cow isn't in season, they're perfectly content just lying around doing nothing, and they don't hit on the cows.

The basic reason has to do with our evolutionary biology, which has a child-rearing strategy that entails along childhood. Given that, children need a long period of nurturing and protection, and that means that both of the parents need to be involved.

Interestingly, that also forms a certain basis for why women and men are not the same in regard to sex drive.  Once a source of 1950s and 1960s style ribald jokes, women, particularly if they have children, are less interested than men, which doesn't mean disinterested.  Anyhow, according to evolutionary biologists, the deal that nature imposed on our DNA is that men would stick with their mates and secure them food and protection, with the biological bargain being struck in favor of sex.  

Now, modern social critics, who often have a poor understanding of biology, fail to note one thing and miss another entirely here.

The missed one is that it's well demonstrated that psychologically sex trips a trigger in our psychology and that what it does to us, in terms of the opposite, is to create a bond pretty much instantly.  That bond never goes away.  Indeed, old romantic tales of people pining for a "lost love" or somebody that they met decades ago are probably related to, or barely disguised depictions of, people having this intimate bond very early and then moving on for some reason, but not getting over it.

The thing social critics bring up about this is "what about cheating men", etc…, but that says something, once again, about wealth.

And survival.

As early in our species' history, by which we pretty much mean up until last Thursday, women died at a high rate, in part because of child bearing, men tended to outlast them.  As recently as the early history of the United States, this remained so much the case that an average "middle class" or "upper class" man was presumed likely to have at least two or three marriages during a lifetime.  It's grim, but it was accepted that women stood a fairly high chance of dying relatively young.  Indeed, not only was this the case for women, but children struggled to make it past about age seven.

A good example of this is provided by Martha Jefferson, who was just 33 years old when she died.  Her health was wrecked by multiple exposures to disease and bearing very heavy children.  But the example doesn't stop there.

Martha Jefferson had been born Martha Wales.  Her father was John Wales and her mother, Martha Wales, née Eppes.  Her parents were married just two years at the time of her birth,   Eppes was a widow when they married, when she was 27 years of age.  Her first two children were born stillborn and the third, the woman who would grow to adulthood and marry Thomas Jefferson, lived, but she died five days latter, essentially a casualty of the birth.

Her father then married Tabith Cocke, who died sometime prior to 1860, meaning that they'd been married six to ten years (her date of death isn't really known).  Martha, her stepdaughter, didn't get along with her.  Her father then married Elizabeth Lomax, who was a widow, and who died but a year later.  Martha didn't get along with her either. Her father then took his slave Betty Hemings, who was "half white" by descent (her father was an English sea captain) into a sexual relationship, producing more children.

Martha Jefferson make Thomas Jefferson promise not to remarry, as she didn't want her children to endure a stepmother.  Jefferson didn't, but then took one of the Hemings as his concubine, or what have you.   This relationship was fairly widely known of, but less well known today is that Sally Hemings was, according to the way Americans account "race" now, 3/4s white and 1/4 black.  Indeed, it was often noted that she bore a resemblance to Martha Jefferson.

Now none of this is meant to be a charming story.  Some of it is downright creepy.  But what we see from it is that people were dying left and right all the time, and women were particularly likely to die young.  Men usually remarried within a couple of years.  In this instance, the perversion of slavery made it easy for both of the men involved to end up taking enslaved concubines, with whom they actually shared a close cultural connection.  Jefferson upheld his promise to Martha not to remarry in that fashion, but only in a deeply weird and sort of technical way.  What this shows us overall is that a biological imperative operating in nature basically regards men as incompetent to raise children on their own and then, death having intervened, they're off and running looking for new female help.

Now things have dramatically changed, and life is about self fulfillment and the like, and if people get in the way of that, even if they are infants, they are to be dumped.

Prior to the 1970s people didn't really have that concept.

Because its not true.

And therein, more likely than not, lies the answer.

If its all about you, after all, leaving them, whomever they are, is not only easy, its the right thing to do.

Of course, it isn't.  And there's some indication that the generations Post Generation Jones know that. As we noted the other day, they're Quiet Quitting and Laying Flat. And there's some indication that they're groping back to social conservatism as well

The Wayles and Jefferson story provides additional illustration of a fundamental truth.  We live in a fallen world, so this area of our lives, like all of our basic genetic instructions, can be set to run off kilter, and sometimes in a very destructive way.

Just as the imperative to eat can go awry in some people to their ultimate demise, the sexual one can get pretty fouled up, and fouled up society wide, as well.  In Wayes and Jefferson's day, that was obviously operating, in that they'd defeated the basic human rights of women to say yes or no to a married relationship. We can't know what conversations Wayles and Hemmings had with two different generations of Hemings women, but we sure know that they were at a colossal disadvantage.  Both women were born into bondage, and saying no was going to be pretty freaking difficult for them.  We don't really know if they ever had said no, as slavery silenced their voices.

So there we have a massive perversion, although certainly not one without a historical precedent.  Arab raiders took Irish women for sex slaves in raids designed just for that purpose, for example.

We benighted souls, of course, endure no such horrors in our modern lives.

Or do we?

In our live the grand perversion, already referenced, is the divorce of sex from reproduction and sex from reasons.  As a super rich society, we've reduced everything to entertainment.

This corruption came first in those parts of our society with the most money and the most free time.  The lives of noble aristocracy, for example, reads like a novel sold that should be sold in a brown paper bag.  Even such a figure as Czar Nicholas II, who was fiercely devoted to his wife and who lead a very conventional moral life as the Russian Emperor, no matter what else we might think of him, had a mistress early on who went on to be his brother's mistress.10   In North America, real libertine behavior or hit first in Hollywood where there was a large surplus of cash, time and superficiality, leading to scandals of all sorts, but more thing that simply never became scandals.  Indeed, even in pre-1945 North America the commonality of divorce amongst celluloid entertainers, when it was fairly rare for everyone else, was blistering. 

Mathilde Kschessinska, Czar Nicholas II's mistress prior to his marriage, who survived the revolution, moved to Parish, and died at age 100.

The association here with Hollywood is important, actually, as the entertainment industry became an agent for the pornographication of the culture and an ally of the destruction of standards during the Sexual Revolution. Why wouldn't it have been? Sex sells, as everyone knows, and in many ways when Hollywood portrayed something in an "avant-garde" fashion, it was merely portraying its own moral standards as practiced behind the movie screen.  People have a long history of normalizing their own conduct, no matter what it is.

And that went on to convert the culture from one in which sex was in fact relegated to marriage as a standard and in reality, to one in which such shows as The Big Bang Theory or Friends operated to tell people there as something wrong with them if they didn't engage in sex readily and casually, and with multiple partners.

Which is a corruption of the basic genetic roadmap nearly as profound as that of Wayles and Hemings taking enslaved women to bed.

And this has had the impact of wearing the trigger.

Even in the early history of the country, in which more than one wife was common, we're really just looking at men who had a handful of "sexual partners".  For Jefferson, it was basically two.  For Wayles, it was four.  It's extremely unlikely there were anymore.  And there is no evidence that the triggers were pulled again until their first "partner" had died.

Playboy, on the other hand, came around and told American men that women should be putting out constantly as women were sterile ditzes and male urges were all that mattered.  The Sexual Revolution came about and changed the standards, and it was really women who were made to suffer.  Their trigger falls, if you will, on a much harder hammer, and they are accordingly much less likely to move on, not having the same evolutionary drive to the same extent as men, as in antiquity, while they might need to move on, they were less likely to. Additionally, choosing wisely was always more of a concern for women, biologically, as they were going ultimately end up with the product of the relationship, children, no matter what.  Single fathers exist, in other words, but not at the same rate as single mothers.

Added to that, the study of pedophiles has shown that one of the statistical factors in their backgrounds is having had five or more sexual partners.  I.e., the risk factor that somebody will become a pedophile increases when they reach that level, which makes sense as by that time the natural unifying aspect of sex is pretty clearly breaking down to yielding instead to urges.  If a person can, in other words, defeat their DNA to the extent that satisfying the base urge, it seems to break down other barriers to satisfying it. When we realize that when we started off looking at this, most Americans did not have sex until they married, and now the average number of "partners" in the US is seven.

This matters to our story as it demonstrates another part of this story.  If the "there's something wrong with you if you aren't doing it" view can break down a person's ingrained inclinations to view the opposite gender as potential lifelong mates and allow some people's eyes to turn to children, it's pretty clearly going to weaken the inclination to stay together at all.

Now, for most people, this isn't going to be the factor leading to a divorce.  It's only one of the background factors in society at large, and that's the overall story.

Most people live according to societal standards pretty much, and accept societal standards pretty much.  Indeed, even in areas as substantial as the ones we're talking about, people will tend to live up, or down, to societal standards.  More than that, they'll tend to comport with them and incorporate them into their own views.

We've already noted some of this. When the standard we're addressing here, that regarding divorce, had a pretty high bar, society at large also had one.  For example, there were real questions on whether or not Ronald Reagan could be elected President, as he was a divorced and remarried man.  In contrast, this didn't even come up with Donald Trump, who is a serial polygamist.  

In other words, all that we've discussed above operated to weaken the bounds of marriage in general and make divorce more common.  It also operated to change the nature of marriage in American society in particular, and in the Western World in general, different from what they had been, which made the obligation to enter it to in a somewhat grave fashion, or enter into it at all, lighter.  

Indeed, due to the latter, a lot of divorces might really be compared to that oddly disused means of separation, annulment.  People tend to think of annulment solely as a religious procedure, but it isn't.  Wyoming, for example, has statutes covering legal separation, annulment, and divorce.  Annulment is rarely used, and legal separation has fallen into disfavor as well.  People simply get divorced. 

But things may seem to be slowly changing, at least by observation.

That the Sexual Revolution was a complete and utter disaster is clear.  It turned out that people didn't go on to happy lives a la Friends or The Big Bang Theory.  Their lives tended to end up a mess.  And over time it seems that younger, post Boomer generations, or at least those that followed after the forgotten and trapped Generation Jones, have tended to grope back, although largely in the dark as all the lights are off, to the prior standards.  Average sexual partner figures were dropping, albeit slightly, for those between 25 and 49.  A separate figure for those now in their teens so surprised the figures at the highly conservative and religious First Things that they did a podcast episode on it noting, in their (rather odd here) view, that teens were abstaining in record numbers for recent times, but for the wrong reasons, giving us once again the odd Boomer view that Gen X,Y, & Z can't do anything right.

Now, it's probably not safe to assume that we're going to return to the standards of the middle 20th Century anytime soon, but by the same token, things are changing.  And in terms of what this blog serves to do, we've certainly seen an interesting long term trend that's important to appreciate.  Starting with the 1960s, fictional depictions of past eras tended to present them with modern, or rather Hollywood modern, mores. But that what things were like.

Which were never accurate, actually.  Divorce rates were never as high as thought to be, and experienced a rise, and fall.

Where we are now, is not where we are going.  Having experimented, it seems younger generations are deeming the experiment a failure, and looking, at least to some extent, for a way back.


Footnotes.

*A thread like this really runs the risk of some people thinking "you are picking on divorced people", or just the opposite, "you are endorsing divorce".

I'm doing neither in this thread.

This is a social history, just trying to track a trend.

To the extent that I'd make any observations on the topics above it would be this.  As standards have changed, the view society takes of divorce has changed also, and as we'll show below, that means that people may be (but in actuality might also not be) more likely to get divorced.  

People generally hold the concept that "marriage is forever", and in the Christian religions it is, although it's really only in the Catholic Churches that this remains a hard and fast rule.  Out in society, and the US is a Protestant country no matter what people might otherwise like to claim, this remains the ideal but with large exceptions, although perhaps not anywhere near as large as commonly imagined.

Societies adapt to even existential changes amazingly rapidly, but often only temporarily.  It's an interesting aspect of our character as a species.  Often, when some big huge change and society is introduced, if it's somehow enforced either through laws or societal standards setters, it'll gain widespread acceptance, sometimes nearly overnight. But the interesting thing on this is that long term views can turn back, particularly if not grounded in our evolutionary makeup.  There are multiple recent examples of this.  

Without adding a thread to the thread, divorce gained widespread acceptance as a concept after 1970, and it retains it, so much so that even a lot of Catholics divorce and remarry, though the Church absolutely prohibits it.  What this means in terms of members of the Apostolic Faiths in general, and Catholics in particular, is one thing (you can't be adherent and ignore these concepts), but what it means out in the larger society at large, which is what we're discussing, and how average people in the statistical majority view it and act up on it, is another.

1.  Well not really the other day, it's now quite some time ago, actually.

This is another post I started some time ago, and then ended up not finishing.  This is unfortunate as, in part, I don't quite recall where I was headed with this, but given as it's an interesting societal topic, I’m going to blather on anyhow, in part because I sort of remember where my brilliant insights were going, and in part because this tied into something completely different that I started writing about, or sort of completely different.

2.  During her marriage to Miller, Monroe was heavily addicted to prescription drugs, both to sleep and to wake up.

I'm really mystified by Monroe's marriage to Miller.  Her marriage to Dougherty makes sense in the context of the times and her, frankly, desperation.  So does her marriage to Joe DiMaggio.

But Miller?

Why?

Frankly, the divorce wasn't surprising either, and in a different context, or perhaps this context, this marriage likely could have been anulled.  She was only 16 and in pretty desperate straights when they married.

3.  The Mauldin story has a surprising end, however.  Bill and Jean Mauldin never lost touch with each other, and towards the end of his life when he became incapacitated, she moved into his house and took care of him.  In the end, therefore, she resumed the role of a wife in a really deep sense.  The couple, in spite of their early rocky start, may have been truly well suited for each other after all.

4.  Outside the US, most English-speaking countries had some variant of an 1857 English law.

5.  Note, however, as a religious matter, the Church of England, like the Catholic Church, disallows divorce.  Be that as it may, since the Second World War the churches of the Anglican Communion have very much diluted their adherence to this expressed belief.

6. We should note here that prior to the Russian Revolution Russia had, of course, a state church in the form of the Russian Orthodox Church, part of the churches that separated from the Catholic Church during the Great Schism.  Eastern Orthodoxy, like Catholicism, is an Apostolic Church, and it holds largely the same set of beliefs, even though a reunion of the two major branches of Christianity has not occurred.  One of the differences between the two branches, however, is that the Orthodox actually allow up to two divorces and three remarriages under some circumstances, although it's a little difficult to grasp what governs this for the non-Orthodox.  It's basically regarded as a concession to human nature.  The Church, that is the pre Schism Catholic Church of which the Orthodox were then part, very clearly did not allow for divorce early on and so this is a development in Orthodoxy which has occurred since the Schism.

7.  So how did this all work out?  Like the protagonists in Chuck Berry's Teenage Wedding?

Not hardly.

According to the Reddit follow up, Chester Linkfield was in and out of jail for the rest of his life, which wasn't all that long.  He worked as a repairman and died of TB at age 32.   At that young age, he'd literally been married to Ernestine for half of his short life.


She remarried less than a month after he died, which is peculiar. She would have known that his death was coming, of course, as TB was a slow but sure killer. Her new husband was Denzil Swan, who died in 1950, and who was listed as divorced at the time, although that doesn't mean that the devorce was from Ernestine, she may have predeceased him.

Their son, born in 1922, was named William Chester Linkfield.  From what little I can tell of him, he served in the Second World War and moved to Pennsylvania at some point.  As odd as it is to realize it, he would have been 16 years old when his father died, the same age his father had been when he married his mother.

8.  Or was it?

To some extent, a person has to wonder if this was just an Appalachian story for the time.  

Appalachia is a region of the country which has remained culturally distinct, and poor, for a very long time.  In most poor cultures, poverty operates against early marriage. A good example of this would have been pre Celtic Tiger Ireland, where generally marriages occurred late due to circumstances, and indeed a fair number of men remained unmarried their entire lives.

As history certainly rhymes, if not repeats, part of what we see now in current late marriage trends may be due to something similar.  The press likes to imagine that young college educated couples are busy pursing their super glamorous careers, 1970s/1980s career propaganda wise, but in fact many are stuck in jobs that pay relatively poorly and can not find a means of actually getting married economically.  This same trend reflects itself in the current trend of multiple generations living in the same household, or older children returning home ot lvie with their parents, all of which are norms of the past.

At any rate, two teenagers dueling over the affection of a young girl isn't hugely surprising in a region where generational feuds had persisted into the late 19th Century.  Her age remains surprising, and icky.

Consider, however, Alvin C. York, the great hero of World War One.

Alvin York after World War One, his mother and younger sister are in the photo.

York was a wild youth who had been involved in violence prior to his profound conversion to Christianity.  He was one of eleven children.  His wife Gracie was 19 at the time of their marriage, almost immediately after his return from service, and they had obviously planned the marriage before he entered the Army.  He'd entered the Army almost exactly two years prior to that.  He was twelve years older than she was.

In other words, York, a Tennessean Appalachian, was from a huge rural family and his wife was relatively young in context, alhtough certainly not twelve, at the time of their marriage. . . but, wait. . . .

Honest compels me to admit here that my wife was 21 when we got married, and I was 31. We became engaged when she was 20.

9.  This is one of the many areas in which the Church, by which we mean the Catholic Church, was an enormously liberalizing force, in spite of what modern day self-appointed pundits like to think.  Up until Christianity giving away girls at a fairly young age was in fact common. The Church put a complete stop to it by simply providing that women couldn't be married to anyone they didn't consent to be married to, a radical, and frankly very protofeminist, position.

10.  Depending upon where you wonder to in social media, sooner or later you'll stumble upon modern monarchist, an exceedingly odd group.

By monarchist, I don't mean English citizens who want to keep their constitutional monarchy.  No, I mean people who really believe in monarchy.

They tend to be highly traditional and often radically Christian traditionalist (never mind that today's real ruling monarchs are Muslims).  They have a variety of reasons they cling to the now long dead body of monarchy, sometimes saying that God has decreed it the ideal form of government, but one of the primary ones is that the monarch is there to set the moral standards.

Which leads me to believe that they've never looked at the lives of real monarchs.

The sexual mores of monarchs, quite frankly, tended to be like something out of Playboy long before Hugh Hefner though it up.  If you read the lives of Kings, for example, its surprising when you find one that didn't have multiple mistresses.

Related Threads:

Shockingly young! Surprisingly old! Too young, too old! Well, nothing much actually changing at all. . . Marriage ages then. . . and now. . and what does it all mean?



Et Ux*: A legal and societal history of marriage